Pizza Party with Slumlord.

It is my duty to inform you that the Slumlord jam palace on Artz Street is no more- the party was finally busted up by various noise complaints after more than a year of cooking, drinking gin and occasionally playing music in my apartment. Although we were threatened with a fine, the police were pretty cordial and even admitted to grooving on the groovy beats. Perhaps we'll see some boys in blue at Gus' Pub this Valentines day, for some Slumlord, Hind Legs, Cannisters, Special Costello and Vixens? How romantic. Ladies, cover your drinks!

The party may be over inside my home, but never inside my heart. And also in Fairview, at the stately Church of Destruction where we will rent a jam space from now on. The cooking will continue in my kitchen of course, from now until the end of time!! Anyway... pizza.

We all know the party just can't stop when you have pizza on your side! I got a pizza stone for Christmas and was itching to try it out. Add my newly-discovered love of baking into the mix and I MUST MAKE PIZZA.

Tomato Sauce

one 796 ml can of whole tomatoes

2 cloves garlic

tablespoon sugar

teaspoon each salt and freshly cracked pepper

healthy dose of olive oil

1 small onion, chopped

Tablespoon dry Oregano

Bay leaf

Heat the olive oil in a medium sized sauce pan until near-smoking, then add your onion and caramelize until golden brown. Add the garlic, crushed, and the oregano, sautéing for a few minutes. Pour in the can of tomatoes, along with the sugar, bayleaf, salt and pepper. Bring to a boil, then lower heat and allow to simmer about 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Puree with a hand-blender or food processor, or just smash everything up somehow. Cool sauce before adding to a pizza. 

Dough of the Rising Crust

1.5 cups All Purpose flour, half a cup Whole Wheat flour

1 Package instant dry yeast

1 cup warm water

2 teaspoons sugar

1 teaspoon salt

2 tablespoons olive oil

Dissolve the yeast with the sugar and water in a medium mixing bowl. We were pretty worried our yeast was a dud because it was here when I moved in, but 15 minutes later it was bubblin crude. Next, add the salt to the flour and mix it bit by bit into the yeasty water, stirring with a spoon first to create a paste, then switching to your hands. Combine until the dough is pulling away from the sides of the bowl, then transfer it to a lightly floured counter. Knead the dough with all your strength for about 10 minutes, then form it into a ball and place it in an olive-oil greased mixing bowl. Cover the bowl with a cloth and allow the dough to rise for 45 minutes to an hour in a warm place- we actually set our oven super low and placed it inside. Once the dough has risen about twice in size, and an obnoxious indentation remains if you poke it with (your finger), it's ready to go. Smash it with your fist to release the air, then either push it out flat onto a pizza stone or greased baking sheet, or roll out with a rolling pin. Don't forget to pinch those edges up for a poofy crust.

Pour sauce on at your discretion and spread all over evenly. I'm not about the cross any personal boundaries and tell you what to put on your pizza. We put thinly sliced green peppers, Calabrese, mozza and greek seasoning because I'm freaky like that. It was spicy and delicious, and I wish I could've shared it with the world! Oh wait, I am.      

This dish seemed appropriate to feature as we are about to debut a spicy Italian meatball of a song: Ain't Got Time To Die, a tribute to local chef Maurizio Bertossi. Thanks for showing us how to make a bitchin' sauce! Until next time, when we show you how to make toast with an amplifier.

-Sev